Crack

by mollykl

As in, the drug, not the sidewalk occurrence. My evil neighbor K convinced me to sign up to Pinterest.  She may be the devil incarnate, as I think Pinterest is quite possibly the web equivelent of crack. Facebook, yeah, that’s interesting. Twitter, never got into. But this…oh this…..

So far, thanks to Pinterest, I have:

1. Made a terrarium with son J.

2. Made a sparkle jar (out of glitter glue, water and an empty Bonne Maman jar).

3. Made a completely rocking stain remover (you know you’re married, have a kid and live in suburbs when you get excited about STAIN REMOVER).

4. Made a chocolate caramel lava cake.

5. Made washable, non-toxic, sidewalk paint.

6. Made non-alcoholic flavored water.

7. Made green iced tea with tangerine.

8. Made gardens markers, for J’s snap-pea and radish garden,  out of wine corks.

9. Made no-bake energy bites for my breakfasts.

Not bad, eh? Son J and I have been having a blast doing “projects”. It’s a win-win: I get to spend time actually things with him other than nagging or lecturing and he gets to get messy. Oh, who am I kidding. Win-win-win because I get to get messy too.

 

Married

by mollykl

I’m married. Have been for almost 13 years now. Was with my now-husband-then-boyfriend for 10 years before we got married. Yes, we were “living in sin” for 5 of those years. Deal with it. I’m in the unusual position of actually still being in love with the man I married, although I’ll admit, he’s a different man than the one I fell in love with in 1989, but then, I’m a different woman. I guess that’s the point: people change and you can accept those changes or not. There are days when I go to work and vent and practically throw things I’m so angry with him. There are days when I’m silent because I’m so amazed that I found one person in the world who not only understands me but doesn’t judge me.

Some 4 years ago, pre- measure 8, I joked with co-worker J that he was welcome to get married and he could see how mundane it actually was.  He said that was the point. He wanted to do the things that I took for granted. And that was when I stopped taking the fact that I was married, and was able to get married, for granted.

Never underestimate a woman.

by mollykl

We built the things that wars were won with. And then we dealt with the aftermath.

The only reason I’m still alive

by mollykl

My head, arteries and heart would have exploded eons ago merely from stress (which I do NOT handle well) were it not for the fact that I can laugh loud and long over the stupidest things.

My husband came in the other night and WOKE ME UP (reminder: I have to be up at 4 a.m. for work) to tell me something that a former classmate posted on Facebook for God’s sake. Totally. Worth it. And I roughly quote:

Cigarettes are like squirrels. They are perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

I don’t mind if you think I’m an idiot because I laugh out loud at things. I figure that laughing is probably the healthiest thing I do on a daily basis. I listen to The News Quiz on ad day, and I will re-play old episodes that I remember are particularly funny. (“What does Nick Clegg stand for? David Cameron entering the room.”)

But yesterday I found this on Zoe Archer’s tumblr blog and it took the cake:

(reblogged from lissbirds originally from instrumentality)

I seriously couldn’t stop laughing today. I had it on my phone and showed it to everyone I encountered. And EVERY SINGLE TIME I erupted into laughter. Not giggles, not a polite ha-ha, but full body howling, holding my sides because my abs were hurting from laughing so much. I heard D laugh his first-in-my-presence non-snarky laugh. My store director, another D, agreed that, yes, it might be an appropriate sign for me to hang in the office and tried to keep a straight face when I said I was going to send it to the head of HR and tell her I thought we needed them in the stores. And, yes yet another, D liked how it had been two days since the previous velociraptor incident. Even R said, near the end of my day, that we were close to making it 3 days without an incident, and could we change the post-it-note?

Because I’m, well, me, here are some of the actual benefits of laughter:

(courtesy of “This Emotional Life” Public Broadcasting System)

Physical benefits of mirth and laughter:

• Increased endorphins and dopamine
• Increased relaxation response
• Reduced pain
• Reduced stress

Cognitive benefits of humor and mirth:

• Increased creativity
• Improved problem-solving ability
• Enhanced memory (for humorous material)
• Increased ability to cope with stress, by providing an alternative, less serious perspective on one’s problems

Emotional benefits of humor and mirth:

• Elevated mood and feelings of well-being
• Reduced depression, anxiety, and tension
• Increased self-esteem and resilience
• Increased hope, optimism, energy, and vigor

Social benefits of humor and mirth:

• Bonding with friends and family
• Reinforcement of group identity and cohesiveness
• Increased friendliness and altruism
• Increased attractiveness to others
• Happier marriages and close relationships

Although I notice that “surviving velociraptor incident” isn’t on the list. Perhaps it should be.