My temper

by mollykl

And boy do I have one. It’s actually gotten better in the past ten years, but it’s still rather explosive (a former boss once likened me to an atom bomb). Today I drove around the block looking for parking dowtown so I could take J into daycare. I finally found one that didn’t have a temporary “no parking for special event” sign and snagged it, loaded the meter and set off with J. About 50 yards from daycare, 50 yards, I hear this woman calling for me, telling me to move my car, because I can’t park there. I tell her there’s no sign and she tells me “it must have fallen off”.  So I snap at her “So I guess I can’t take my kid to daycare – thanks” and haul J back into the car and off to find another parking place.

So what’s the downside? J had to witness all of this. No there wasn’t any swearing (which if you know me is remarkable), but he still had to see me get angry. Now, I don’t really have a problem with that – he’ll figure out that everyone gets angry and everyone loses their temper at some point. But I feel that it’s not a good way for him to start his day, especially when he woke up in such a great and happy mood. I’ve always had this temper and it’s always been an issue. I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t take it out on other people, I just try to close down as much as possible, which will probably give me a damn ulcer at some point.

When I got into daycare (or “school” as we call it), Miss L, one of J’s teachers, took one look at me and said, “You’re not having a good morning.”  On the way home I measured my options: A. cry, B. have a bloody mary, or C. go for a run and listen to “Sabotage” as loud as my i-pod can possibly manage.

C turned out to be a pretty good option. Must remember for future temper tantrums.